Thursday, November 13, 2008

My baby girl is sick

For the past 4 days, my little munchkin has been sick with the flu. and let me tell you. Its been a rough 4 days. She doesnt feel good, so she doesnt want to eat or drink anything, and she has been sleeping in our bed with us because there is no way in heck she will let me put her down in her crib. She will scream and scream and hold on for dear life and cry "mama" if i try to put her in her crib. I feel so bad for my little angel. I have tried EVERYTHING to help her get better. But nothing has seemed to work. I am an exhausted mommy.. with zach working all the time, i have no time to relax, no time for myself. I really could use one day of pampering myself. I love my little girl to death. but i hope she feels better soon so she's not so clingy to me.


Mommy loves you baby girl

Monday, November 3, 2008

Before i was a Mom

Before I was a Mom
I made and ate hot meals.
I had unstained clothing.
I had quiet conversations on the phone.

Before I was a Mom,
I slept as late as I wanted
And never worried about how late I got into bed.
I brushed my hair and my teeth everyday.
I cleaned my house each day.
I never tripped over toys or forgot words of lullabies.
I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous.
I never thought about immunizations.

Before I was a Mom
I had never been puked on
Pooped on
Spit on
Chewed on
Peed on
Or pinched by tiny fingers

I had complete control of:
My thoughts
My body
And my mind.
I slept all night.

Before I was a Mom
I never held down a screaming child
So that doctors could do tests
Or give shots.
I never looked into teary eyes and cried.
I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.
I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep.
I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't want to put it down.
I never felt my heart break into a million pieces
When I couldn't stop the hurt.
I never knew that something so small
Could affect my life so much.
I never knew that I could love someone so much.
I never knew I would love being a Mom.

Before I was a Mom
I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body.
I didn't know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby.
I didn't know that bond between a Mother and her child.
I didn't know that something so small
Could make me feel so important.
I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay
I had never known the warmth
The joy
The love
The heartache
The wonder
Or the satisfaction of being a Mom.

I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much before I was a Mom.